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Just Another Day At Work

If you’ve worked in retail then you’ve seen strange sights that would top
anything ever seen by the Northern Lights that Robert Service wrote about.
Here’s a couple of tales to make your day at work seem brighter by
comparison.

I worked for a couple of years for a major department store in what they
called the Big Ticket department: Furniture, Electronics, Appliances and
Mattresses. One day I was at the cash desk that stood between furniture and
appliances working my way through my client binder and making phone calls.
In front of me was a store lifestyle display of a bedroom set, with the
mattress dressed in bedcovers from the linens department.

As I’m standing there on the phone, an homeless guy who is obviously
intoxicated stumbles by, stops, walks up to the bed, and then strips down to
his underwear, crawls under the covers, and goes to sleep.

I can honestly say that was a first.

Heart-warmingly, the security guard I summoned was remarkably polite in
coaxing the old man to get dressed and leave the store.

In an unrelated incident, one day at the Sony Store I managed one of my
salesmen, Denis, was showing a MiniSystem stereo to a lady with a small
child who kept trying to get her attention.

“Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!”

“Hush, please” replied the mom “I’m talking to this gentleman.”

This repeated itself a couple of times, then the kid shrugged, turned
around, undid his zipper and started to pee on the carpet.

The mom was oblivious until Denis’ sales pitch trailed off mid-sentence and
she saw the look of horror on his face.

“OH MY GOD!” she screamed, and grabbed her son by the armpits, picked him up
and ran with him, still peeing, out the door. “I’ll be back later!” she
yelled on her way out.

She never came back.

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