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One Thing I Learned While I Sat in the Hospital

Last Monday, Riley (my 4 year old daughter) had a routine MRI.  In our world, MRI’s are relatively routine.  Riley had a bone marrow transplant in November 2010 to treat a genetic disease that she has called Hurler’s Syndrome.

We had a 10AM appointment at Duke.  We arrived around 9:30, made our way to the Pediatric Radiology area, and were taken to the prep room.  Turns out the pediatrician didn’t feel comfortable putting Riley under sedation because of her fear that if something went wrong that she would be inept to handle it.  We were then scheduled to go under general anesthesia at noon.  We went up to the Surgical Waiting area.  2:30 PM – Riley is “put to sleep” and we are sent out to wait for them to complete the MRI.

We were expecting a quick day; I thought I’d be to the office by noon.  We didn’t bring books or computer or anything really – which is very rare.  I did have my phone and came across a post by a friend on Facebook.  It was a TED talk…nice and short – 5 minutes long.  I decided to watch.  It was titled “3 things I learned while my plane crashed” given by Ric Elias.

His first two “things he learned” are “it all changes in an instant” and “I regretted the time I wasted on things that don’t matter with people that matter – I no longer try to be right but rather happy.”  Good lessons.

But he really got me with his third – “the only thing that matters in my life is being a great dad.  Above all, the only goal I have in life is to be a good dad.”

This really hit me.  As I was stressing about getting back to the office – a company I’ve named after my daughter – I realized that I was in the middle of fulfilling the goal that is and should be central to my life.  All of my other goals, should in some way, be about pursuing this goal for myself. I get so wrapped up in being everything to everyone else; I forget that if that is at the expense of being a good dad, I lose.

If you don’t have children, this may be hard to understand, but if you do, don’t forget what really matters.  Prioritize your life around your children.  There is no way that you can have more positive influence on a single human life than to be a good parent.

“Nothing I’ve ever done has given me more joys and rewards than being a father to my children. ” – Bill Cosby

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